Hi Anilist I read all of I Want To Hold Aonokun so Badly I Could Die in like a month and wanted to write a review on it with the hopes of exposing more people to the series because so far at the time of writing this there are 55 chapters available to be read in English it is really really really really good. First though: Aonokun is a romance but dont take the simplistic art style at face value or write off the horror aspect of Aonokun as oh its just a horror because he is a ghost. Id argue Aonokun is a horror before it is a romance. Dont get me wrong though I think the shoujo elements of the story are very welldone but it isnt something to just write off because you think its about a girl with a ghost boyfriend. So heres some content warnings before you add it to your toread list because the story can get quite heavy and itd suck if someone just jumped into it expecting it to be a silly story about a girl with her ghost boyfriend doing silly shoujo things. Because its not that. At all. Body horror child abuse and neglect child death sexual assault sexual coercion and manipulation and suicide + suicidal ideation. Aonokun is about Yuri and Aonos relationship and the struggles of navigating dating your ghost boyfriend Its also about how much it sucks when your ghost boyfriend sometimes gets possessed by an evil spiritor maybe he IS the evil spirit?and loses control over his ghostly body to do evil spirit things. Its also about when your ghost boyfriend is presumably tied to the world because ghosts only haunt things when they cant let something go and have regrets right? And you should be probably helping him try to move on so he can rest in peace? But if you help him move on then you will be all alone again and no one has ever cared for you before and its selfish to think like that or to want him to stay but its still painful because he is a ghost and you cant actually be together and you want to hold him so badly you could die. While the story centers on Yuri and Aonos relationship and the way its flavored through unhealthy codependence eventually we get to see more of the side characters. To understand Aono and his nature as a ghost especially when he begins lashing out and doing evil spirit things she ends up befriending an agoraphobic horror junkie named Mio and Aonos best friend Fujimoto. And so Yuri who was previously friendless makes her first friends and slowly opens herself up to the world around herwhich happens to be a world that exists both with and without Aono. Slowly Yuri comes to terms that she cannot exist only for Aonos sakebut the story is very real when approaching these topics and often Yuri will have an epiphany and then cycle back around to acting on codependent impulses anyways. Aono isnt safe from this either he appears much more independent and realistic about their relationship but since Yuri is the only person with whom he can really interact with inevitably the problems and complexes he secretly has begin coming out to play. Without trying to give too much away Yuri and Aonos respective character arcs thus far are really really good. Yuri begins the story as a bit of an airhead a lonely girl with no friends someone who puts such a heavy emphasis on love as escapism and projects this onto Aono. Over the course of the manga she begins to learn she cant place these expectations on people that she has to be able to stand up for herself and letting people hurt her or hurting herself isnt love. Aono in the beginning as the deceased popular boy from school seems to be the supportive gentle type but also as a ghost hes a perfect embodiment of the Hes sweet he just goes into a dissociative state and commits atrocities tumblr post. His personality is much more complex than it initially appears he is someone who intentionally waters himself down to be more palatable and liked by others. Yuri eventually comments that he smiles when he is sad and frowns when he is happy. Its been very interesting to read the story and watch it slowly shift overtime Yuri begins as a girl who is extremely codependent on Aono with whom he is really only dating because he liked the attention and felt sort of bad for to Aono now being the one who is extremely reliant on Yuri as he finds himself grow increasingly jealous in the face of her discovering friends and making new relationships and being able to exist in a world that can go on without him. Something that Aonokun does really well is horror which probably goes without saying since this is a horror shoujo but still. The art style is a little simplistic in flavor but I dont think this is a problem at all when the visual storytelling is as strong as it is a la Houseki no Kuni in my opinion. Shiina gives Yuri shoujostyle shimmering eyes very often which is a fun juxtaposition with the body horror. Also the way Umi Shiina draws expressions is really good most notably when shes contrasting Aonos facial expressions when hes normal vs when hes in evil spirit mode. Ill never forget that first panel I read where he went a little crazy and thought to myself oh its THIS sort of manga. Contrast and negative space are used very efficiently here especially to delineate the difference between something going on thats more supernatural in flavor whether thats a room that someone cant leave or a black void when evil spirit Aono is talking with Yuri et cetera. I cannot begin to tell you how often I was having to stop and silently scream to myself whisper I fucking hate it here under my breath over a new character reveal or story note put my head in my hands or audibly mutter oh my god as I was reading. Rereading the story yes thats right there are only 55 chapters and I am already rereading the whole thing after like a month is another treat on its own because the foreshadowing is extremely satisfying. Itll be even more fun to go back through the whole thing once the story is actually done because its already been a very rewarding revisit and Im sure Shiina has quite a lot left in the story to tell. Again its hard to say much without letting the reader experience the slow shift for themself but Aonokun uses ghosts and hauntings as a vehicle to discuss very real very tangible everyday things and its really satisfying to watch that all come together. Aonokuns supernatural world is real and tangible and interacted with by people who have spiritual inclinations but it is also often a metaphor for something that isnt supernatural in flavor at all creating a really fun interaction between these two things that dont feel like they should intersect. Overall Im very excited to see where Aonokun goes with its story and I really think this is a story more people should be checking out especially considering the attention The Summer Hikaru Died is getting right now As someone whos been following both stories I think Aonokun blows Hikaru out of the water so Im giving the story what I think is its due justice and writing a review here about it. If you like Hikaru I can thoroughly recommend Aonokun. Also Tatsuki Fujimoto Chainsaw Man and Shuzo Oshimi Blood on the Tracks Flowers of Evil are both readers and have even drawn fan art for the story so if youve read any of those and you like what the story does with its themes check it out. Otherwise heed the content warnings and consider giving it a read if you like horror and stories about weird relationships. Giving the story a score feels weird when its not done so Im just giving it a 90/100 because theres still room for it to fall flat on its face but what the story has so far is amazing and its easily a new favorite of mine