TEEKYUU 500https://i.yt.com/vi/XQmXdOYtqsA/maxresdefault.jpg Okay its finally time to talk about my real favorite anime. I mean I figured itd be a perfect time to do it with the ninth seasonhttps://anilist.co/anime/98566/Teekyuu9 coming up so I just decided hey lets do a motherfucking Teekyuu review. Millepensee how can you make such a great anime? Tennis gags? Yes. Alien Teekyuu best Teekyuu? Yes.https://www..com/watch?v=jTfjg2LYquY You just end up watching an episode and saying yeah sure Ill watch another episode. Then you realize oh SHIT you just marathonned seven seasons of Teekyuu back to back. To conclude the first ever TGG review of a TV short that isnt literally go fuck yourselfhttps://anilist.co/anime/19315/Pupa I give it a score of 65 out of 100. And I know that seems low but god damn for these reviews that is comparatively high. Anyways yeah thats the whole thing. Upvotes please. This is literally the fourteenth anime review Im taking a page from Millefleshrots book and slimming these things down to only the essentials. No more gimmicks. The gimmicks had a good run but its time to go back to vanilla and ranty TGG reviews of a few months agookay what the flying fuck is that. 220http://i.ur.com/08zhuEq.png That is so shoddily made. Like one look at it and right away you go oh okay yeah thats totally the thing that its supposed to be and not something that was just slapped together.https://anilist.co/anime/21560/Berserk A Microsoft paint Brand of Sacrifice? I mean didnt I just say no more gimmicks? Look Anilist deserves a Teekyuu review and that is what this is. Sacrifice? Get outta here I dont give a shit about the Invocation of Doom 500http://i.ur.com/rlmaykE.png Berserk: Falcon of the Millepensee Empire 500https://i.ur.com/1SlFkFU.jpg BERSERK 2017 OR BERSERK 2 IS JUST STRAIGHT UP THE CONTINUATION OF BERSERK 2016https://anilist.co/anime/21560/Berserk WHICH ITSELF COVERS FROM AN ALTERED START OF THE MANGA THEN SIDESTEPS TWO ENTIRE ARCS AND SKIPS OVER THE GOLDEN AGE STUFF BECAUSE THATS BEEN ADAPTED TWICEhttps://anilist.co/anime/33/KenpuuDenkiBerserk ALREADYhttps://anilist.co/anime/10218/BerserkOugonJidaihenIHaounoTamago. BERSERK 2017 AT LEAST STARTS IN AND ENDS WITH FALCON OF MILLENIUM EMPIRE STUFF. POINT IS THIS WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR EVERYTHING BEFORE THIS PART OF THE MANGA/SERIES. That warning shouldnt even be needed at this point but... A Brief Introductory Note Since this is the second review I will be attempting to not overly repeat anything I said beforehttps://anilist.co/review/anime/2120. But Ill certainly be addressing the returning flaws from 2016 as well as the slight improvements since and any sudden or sharp changes in quality that just sort of happen with NO warning whatsoever. Thinking about it a bit further an actual serious attempt to not write another four thousand word long review on this adaptation seems futile. But yes here we go again. Another season of Millepenseeshttp://anilist.co/studio/6073/Millepensee Berserk. I really dont think anybody asked for a season two this time around. Which is sad because people waited NINETEEN YEARS since the 97 animehttp://anilist.co/anime/33/Berserk to see an anime with Guts beyond the Golden Age. But since they announced the second season with the end of the first season it must mean they had been planning on doing 24 episodes from the start no matter what. After all as far as my knowledge goes Berserk 2016 sold like absolute dogshit. But no matter how negative I may be towards MillepenshouldsticktoTeekyuus Berserk I cant really say I wish that it didnt exist at all because maybe if it didnt we wouldnt have gotten Berserk Musou. Which... just yes. God yes.https://www..com/watch?v=NnoAR89rVg Still where there is a Berserk adaptation... I will unfortunately eventually end up there. Hell Ill even read the new light novelhttp://www.animenewsnetwork.com/dailybriefs/20170424/retailerslistberserknovelbyanimescriptwritermakotofukami/.115211 if it ever gets translated even though its WRITTEN by one of the guy who did the new animes script which immediately raises a red flag. But Miura did the illustrations so its possibly canon unless he outright says its not at some point in the future??? I dont even know anymore man. I really dont. Before we really finally get this party truly started again I just want to say on a serious note that the Berserk 2016 review was the first review I wrote and it was the start of a downhill slope of a bunch of horriblehttps://anilist.co/review/anime/2156 shithttps://anilist.co/review/anime/2215 happeninghttps://anilist.co/review/anime/2224. And looking back I have a bunch of problems with my Berserk 2016 review. Therefore following eesnepelliM and GEMBAs examples I will make an effort to improve with this Berserk 2017 review. In doing so I will start by sharing how to make a proper well loved and faithful adaptation of a manga the MilesforPens and GEMBA way. 440http://i.ur.com/brWFtpp.jpg First get the manga in question to be sacrificed to the dark lords your trusty clanging instrument some handily packaged Behelits from Walmart and the rest is selfexplanatory really. You cant make a proper anime adaptation without breaking some manga. I mean like everyone knows that. No wild manga were harmed in the making of this review. I was stopped before I could go through with it. Lets Start Out Positive Hey anybody remember that first teaser they released where CG Guts face was actually Guts face? Also the Dragonslayer fucking bent as he swung it but for at least one shot of the teaser they had CG Guts actually have a 2D face. But of course they realized the main character having a 2D face throughout all of the action scenes and most of the dialogue scenes would be way more expensive so they jettisoned that. https://www..com/watch?v=WXWDTb73AeE Point is its very slight but in Berserk 2017 Guts and Cascas CG faces actually look... somewhat better? Its sort of telling that this is actually a positive that Im bothering to mention. Oh yeah the characters look more like the characters theyre supposed to be. Also CG Griffith is actually pretty alright so theres that too. The OP is... well first off I liked Inferno of the first season but honestly I actually really prefer Sacrifice. 9MM Parabellum Bullet calmed themselves down a little bit because for season two the opening of the show is an actual opening rather than just the Eclipse shrinked down to a minute. Also why is the openinghttps://www..com/watch?v=Kx1TghelNQ now entirely 2D and why is the 2D better than the first seasons opening? Millemisery do you just love laughing at an entire fanbase? The first seasons opening at least had a few seconds of CG Guts clumsily swinging the Dragonslayer around at nothing in an empty field. Because you know thats the actual show. But okay people seem to like the 2D parts the best lets make the entire season 2 opening 2D while keeping the rest of the show almost entirely CG. Thatll definitely fix the problem. Oh yeah were not in Conviction land anymore so at the very least we dont have to tolerate any more of Nina. I didnt even mention her in the first review because they actually captured her character perfectly. The walking worst part of the Conviction arc manga or otherwise is gone. Hell yes Im actually seriously listing this as a positive. 440http://i.ur.com/AXSbFJP.jpg Most of Schierkes magic stuff and stuff with the Astral Realm was pretty good. Matter of fact that was probably my overall favorite part of Berserk 2017 to be honest. 440http://i.ur.com/ouHYIbl.png 440http://i.ur.com/T5WC7LS.png 440http://i.ur.com/NOZPY4d.png 440http://i.ur.com/NBEYVmn.png Um... there wasnt any outright copy and pasted mobs this time... they still do the CG and 2D on the screen at the same time but its certainly lessened comparing to last season. Thats about all I can think of right now. Now lets not have any more false starts and just get into it finally. The More Things Clang... the More They Stay Hai Yo. Episode one thirteen here we GO. https://www..com/watch?v=MMqpdxdKH0g Why is the camera shaking? Good lord could you just keep it stable for two seconds? The shaking does not add to the actioOH GOD RAPID FIRE CLANGS. THEY LEARNED NOTHING. Guts still clangs Zodd clangs Grunbeld clangs. Really the clangs must just be an indicator if its a strong character or not. Literally no other characters clang. And yes its the exact same clang from season one. They still didnt have enough money for a new sound effecthttps://www..com/watch?v=7IClfBHSxec. But you know I have to state I do respect Millefoolery for sticking to their guns and keeping the clang. The memeshttps://www..com/watch?v=IngYY4iWI this show has spawned aside like Hai Yo the clang is a staple of this adaptation. A small part of me would have been sad if it was gone. Wait. What? 440http://i.ur.com/s0XH1lM.png 440http://i.ur.com/QFDe2Kd.png 440http://i.ur.com/MCyuoQk.png 440http://i.ur.com/SZdmyjk.png ...Guts used his sword as an actual sword against the ogre in episode nineteen. It clearly cuts through the ogre and it does not clang. But spirits possessed little girls soldiers... everything else it clangs against? And I mean the clang is present throughout the episodes after this one so... why? Seriously why only this scene? 440http://i.ur.com/IyxMtpv.png Actually I was wrong. It happens against the trolls in both the episode before and after this one. Still why only against the trolls and ogres? 440http://i.ur.com/Yg8spVp.png Oh my god they did Raksas PERFECTLY. And in full 2D Wait no the only reason why they would do that is if this is his only appearance in what theyre covering of the arc. I was correct. Berserk 2017 is only covers a part of the Millennium Falcon arc. Unfortunate but was to be expected. There was no way we were ever gonna get to the boat. Or the 440http://i.ur.com/CIsPelR.png 440http://i.ur.com/Ujj2k13.png Was kind of really surprised that we even got to see the Abyss. You know since both times it actually appears other than this time have always been skipped over by various Berserk adaptations. Its what he says in the manga too but I could only stifle a laugh when Guts says hes seen it before in Berserk 2017. Yeah we could have seen the introduction of it if they hadnt decided to just skip everything else to just get to Conviction with Berserk 2016. Its fine really. The entire main theme of the first review was me ranting about them leaving things out from the manga. I shouldnt be annoyed that they actually included something even if they left out the actual introduction or explanation of the thing they included. Seriously Stop With Hai Yohttps://www..com/watch?v=zIE7vl8ayXE For the full experience only click on the above link while wearing headphones and having volume up to full blast. I had thought they were going a little bit crazy with this in the first season. Almost every single time Guts appears or steps out with the Dragonslayer Hai Yo starts to play. I know its Susumu Hirasawa and hes a walkinghttps://www..com/watch?v=et5qY46rQ musicalhttps://www..com/watch?v=OwZTl57VYk godhttps://www..com/watch?v=SjPJm55cTm0 but there is such a thing as overuse. I honestly think that GEMBA and co. honestly couldnt afford a full Susumu Hirasawa OST like some other Berserk adaptationshttps://anilist.co/anime/33/KenpuuDenkiBerserk or maybe Susumu Hirasawa was like... No you can have TWO songs. Only two. Because I dont want people to associate my music with... well with this. 440https://i.redd.it/zlganyqrf70z.gif And quite honestly I cant blame the man if that was actually true. He probably felt obligated because apart from Satoshi Kons stuff which are all winners by the way especially thishttps://anilist.co/anime/1943/Paprika and thishttps://anilist.co/anime/1178/DetonatorOrgun the only series hes ever done music for is Berserk. Like if they had just tried a bit harder with the OST they wouldnt have had to rely on Hirasawas Hai Yo and Ash Crow. With season two I guess they felt that they needed to experiment because on two separate occasions both early as well as later in the season they suddenly just bust out some jazz. ...Jazz? In Berserk? You... you did watch the previous Berserk adaptations right? You did... you did listen to the music Susumu Hirasawa did for Berserk beforehttps://www..com/watch?v=Ew3XVFioU right? Why in the fuck would you ever think jazz would be a good idea to trips over a stack of conveniently placed frying pans But no really jazz aside almost the entire OST is totally forgettable and thats just... honestly one of my least favorite parts of the entire series. Maybe Im just biased because of how much I love the 97 series/Susumu Hirasawa. But no really... theres Hai Yo Ash Crowhttps://www..com/watch?v=Mva6nc7YBpk thishttps://www..com/watch?v=jTfjg2LYquY Blood and Guts but thats from the 2012 movieshttps://www..com/watch?v=MC7H1rOU1Gg some generic metal and/or horror sounding stuff and thats basically the entire OST that I can even barely remember at this point. Well actually there was also My Brotherhttps://www..com/watch?v=Tr6BMiHMPtI. Which was quite good but for some reason every time I hear it I just think Ive heard it from somewhere else. Oh right its actually a remix and from the 2012 MOVIEShttps://www..com/watch?v=UVrcMRq7saA. But its fine really. Why even try to do something new when you can just rely on the music from past adaptations? Just be sure to get Susumu Hirasawa to do at least a few songs and then use those as much as humanly possible until people literally get sick of it. I honestly truly liked Hai Yo early on in the first season. Its literally one of the handful of reasons why I and several others stuck around. People were literally trying to construct Hai Yo each week when they played snippets of it before Hirasawas new Berserk album with it even came out. But I can safely say despite it being a Hirasawa song because of how much they relied on it I wouldnt mind if I never heard it ever again. Oh yeah. I almost want to genuinely applaud them for apparently at least having enough sense to go with Ash Crow with the Berserker Armor reveal. Because I genuinely was preparing myself for a completely out of place Hai Yo. Hai Yo does not fit the Berserker Armor or even the Grunbeld fight in general for that matter. Its supposed to be a fucking hugely dread and violent struggle against this gigantic Apostle fire dragon and Guts has now been put in a suit that will essentially force him to continue fighting as his bones break because the armor will literally dig into his flesh and repair his body enough to where he will still be able to move. 440http://i.ur.com/BOqNWII.png I was going to applaud them but then in the actual fight Hai Yo starts on full blast the moment Schierke helps Berserker Guts get back in control of the armor. Like immediately the moment you can see Guts eyes through the armor Hai Yo starts. Yeah no thats okay Hai Yo definitely fits for a severe and desperate battle against an inhuman monster... or trolls or ogres... and it also fits for when Guts steps out to brutally kill a bunch of just normal human soldiers. It fits for everything so why not use it for everything. Oh hey got an idea. Heres an idea of how Guardians of Desire from that little unimportant arc of the manga you know the very first one which they mangled entirely THE BLACK SWORDSMAN ARC would play out if it would ever be animated it wont and its animated by Milleplease and GEMBA I hope it wonthttps://www..com/watch?v=pxnWn0JmdhI. Again as always thanks goes out to the Berserk meme community which yes is a thinghttps://www.reddit.com/r/berserklejerk/ who I know for a fact LOVED Berserk 2016 and Berserk 2017 because it gave them so much material. Really Not Much Else Going For It Beyond the CG Monsters I think in general the CG for most of the monsters is fine. Some of the CG Apostles are iffy at best but at least they got Grunbeld down okay. 440http://i.ur.com/UpTdelx.png 440http://i.ur.com/57H7Rck.png 440http://i.ur.com/l6iIY3p.png 440http://i.ur.com/U681PFe.png Which I suppose is the absolute bare minimum because when you say were gonna adapt Falcon of the Millennium to a Berserk fan immediately their minds are going to jump to Oh God how bad is the Grunbeld fight/Berserker Armor going to look? and I hate to say it but... the fight itself was okay. Id still take what a random Berserk fan could edit together from past adaptationshttps://www..com/watch?v=THLrGbLUAwt=229s over it for a billion years though. The PS2 game looks better is not just a silly meme holy shit. Admittedly he also threw some of the Berserk Musous which came out literally thirteen years after the PS2 game cutscenes in there for what was missing from the PS2 game. 440http://i.ur.com/sGyjtYo.png There he is. The best Apostle of all of Berserk animated. My boy Schnoz. Also can I just take a moment to say that... from season one I hated Millehack and GEMBAs tendency to put credits over scenes? I didnt even bother to mention it the first time around but this time they actually did it with one of my favorite parts of this arc and probably one of my overall favorite panels of Berserk in its entirety. One of the better scenes of the episode and Berserk 2016/2017 in general hey lets put fucking CREDITS OVER IT. 440http://i.ur.com/smetVLm.png 440http://i.ur.com/9l6eESD.png 440http://i.ur.com/djlJQe6.png 440http://i.ur.com/QtgyIYX.png ...I really like this scene and even how they did it. Like seeing Guts party through Guts eyes while in the Berserker Armor and their panicked voices being distorted... but sure yeah lets put the credits over this scene. No big deal. But would they have ever put credits over Guts fights trolls as Hai Yo gets blasted? Nope not in a MILLION FUCKING YEARS. 440http://i.ur.com/2tU7QVB.jpg The Worst Episode of Both Seasons Episode 9 or Episode 21 Theres no way this wasnt gonna get a section for itself. The very slight improvement of this season puts you off guard and then wham. Theres no excuse for this really. Are we still at its better than nothing? How far does the rabbit hole go? https://www..com/watch?v=mHt3xszL9wg Disclaimer: That Hai Yo is for comedic effect because again Ash Crow plays on the immediate reveal of the Berserker Armor not Hai Yo. I honestly did not think they could top that episode in Berserk 2016 with the cult orgy which was really really badhttps://www..com/watch?v=OUoA0xyWvc. This is the episode where the Berserker Armor is revealed and its just absolutely awful. I know that they probably saved all their money and time for the Berserker Armor itself as well as the impending Grunbeld fight there was a recap episode the week following this episode as if to underline that fact but oh dear god. Like obviously they were not prepared to actually have to animate Apostles all of a sudden. Especially not several in the same episode. Apostles just sort of suddenly transitioning into their Apostle forms is just... unforgivable. Its even worse that they actually did it with Zodd too. You know considering weve seen him transform beforehttps://youtu.be/h63YO1cInQM?t=4m18s... This episode is so bad that it honestly... like if this episode wasnt anywhere near as bad as it was I would have probably put Berserk 2017 actually above Berserk 2016. But the overall incompetence of this episode alone has dragged it back down into the mud where it belongs with its sibling. Not Important To This Arc or Review At All 500http://i.ur.com/HgdljgB.png The Pinnacle of Despair 440http://i.ur.com/7ubG3oA.png I cant believe they decided to end with the introduction of the cartoon pirates. The Grunbeld Fight the Boat... both of the best spots where they could have ended it they decided to go with the Pirates instead. I just cant believe this. Oh well Im fine with them just ending here rather than rushing any further to get to something else... 440http://i.ur.com/aGegd4Z.png Yeah alls well that ends well... lets just get to the credits... Im sure well get to see the rest of this arc animated never. Because theres literally no fucking way therell be a season three... 440http://i.ur.com/blsDkzT.png ...Excuse me? Arent we ending here? What is going on? 440http://i.ur.com/0X3j2ia.png ...After twenty four episodes youre doing this now. 440http://i.ur.com/g23g12z.png 440http://i.ur.com/JEuA1sZ.png ...Youre finally giving us a full 2D nonflashback scene at the very end of the adaptation. With very little chance of a season three happening and even if it did the CG would be back in full force just like it was with this time. 440http://i.ur.com/eWzkOI2.png ...Not only did you wait until now to do this but you decided to have the credits run over this scene. 440http://i.ur.com/0sVCpp6.png 440http://i.ur.com/MxGCLUZ.png 440http://i.ur.com/8fj75f2.png 440http://i.ur.com/ocCNwcB.png ...You cracked and you decided to give us what we wanted from the very beginning but you simultaneously still managed to ruin it. 440http://i.ur.com/6pcQQXS.png 440http://i.ur.com/uZrTXqk.png 440http://i.ur.com/7DWvpcb.png 440http://i.ur.com/GnRkkYD.png ...I just dont understand. I cant even begin to try and wrap my head around it. 440http://i.ur.com/upNAgpU.png ...https://www..com/watch?v=k7azRQ1jDx0 440https://68.media.tumblr.com/851d459c5cca854d9dd42fe73e6151cd/tumblrml8hqlV3sk1qzqnxxo1500.gif Conclusion ...I never want to talk about this adaptation ever again. And thankfully it seems like I wont have to. 440http://i.ur.com/fQNQKnL.png Because if they were gonna do a season three I dont see why they would have put the story continues because that just reads like just go read the manga dudes. This adaptation was a very mixed bag until the very end but Berserk 2017 did... feel kind of better than Berserk 2016. But part of that for me is because again with this season they were starting as well as ending in Falcon of the Millennium. Berserk 2016 started with a VERY LIGHT touch of Black Swordsman stuff and just skipped full steam to straight up Conviction. Which... infuriated and still infuriates me. If it wasnt for that one really trainwreck of an episode Id give this season like a 65 out of 100. But instead a 6 out of 10 is a fine. The exact same score I gave to Berserk 2016 which is admittedly still on an overall basis worse than this. So yeah to conclude go watch Teekyuuhttps://www..com/watch?v=e23qODH79c4. I genuinely only watched Teekyuu because of Berserk 2016 because I wanted to have a look into the other anime Millepensee had done and... youd be surprised. It was pretty enjoyable and I will in fact be watching the ninth season and I hope there are many more because Id rather Millepensee keep going than the ICLA guyshttps://anilist.co/studio/6078/ILCA with Yami Shibaihttps://anilist.co/anime/98978/YamiShibai5. Am I really beginning and ending a Berserk review with Teekyuu shilling? Yes yes I am. Teekyuu forever. 440https://68.media.tumblr.com/efebf93a965830afd01388e91a1a7372/tumblrnmstnqr4KR1t33d6lo1500.gif